Volume 2 Chapter 8 – The Great Poison Sect’s Great Misfortune (2)

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Whew, there’s a lot of people gathered here. Softie said this was the cultural exchange, and I think she explained what it was to me, but I wasn’t listening. Instead of the monotonous scene of people wearing black robes, there were all kinds of colors. Apparently, only the Shadow Devil Sect is allowed to wear black. Other sects had their own colors, and the weaker sects sometimes used the same color, but black was unique to the Shadow Devil Sect. And Softie told me only the Star Phoenix Sect could wear red after Durandal asked. I almost forgot the Star Phoenix Sect was my mortal enemy until Durandal reminded me. But I’m a fox now! So there’s no reason for the Star Phoenix Sect to want to kill me at all.

“Outrageous! Who do you think you are!?” a man in purple stood up and shouted at me. Around him, there were a bunch of other people wearing purple too.

“Those are the Great Poison Sect members, Chosen Lucia! Please, avenge my belly button!”

This guy has a serious attachment to his belly button. Since the greedy…, great? Since the Greedy Poison Sect tried to kill me by contaminating the impurity-cleansing pool that I was going to use, they implicated a whole lot of people! At least thirty. I’m sure there’s more, but I didn’t want to spend time counting them and thirty seems like a lot. And as a chosen of the sect, those implicated people—like the guy who had his belly button turned into a nipple—flocked around me because Mr. Shoe was the elder on duty at the time, but he ran away somewhere. Since I’m a naturally charismatic leader, I decided to lead this righteous cause!

Durandal nodded at the purple-robed person. “Once we rob them, I want all their swords. They look like they’d have exquisite swords.”

…Robbing people is a righteous cause! Hmm? How? Simple! I’m doing it out of love for Durandal, and any act done out of love is righteous. The bonuses that come with the swords are the world’s way of rewarding me for being a good person. Mn. This is justified.

Softie coughed. Was she sick? Don’t tell me the poison got her too! My encyclopedia can’t die on the day I meet her! That’s really bad luck. “Lucia? You’re not going to respond to them?”

Respond to who? Ah! Right. “I’m Lucia Fluffytail, chosen of the Shadow Devil Sect! And you’re the bastards who tried to assassinate me!”

“Us? Bastards? Assassinate? You?”

Hah. It looks like these people were slower than Softie. He only spoke four words, but all of them were questions! “Yes, you. If you’re not bastards, then what are you? Assassinate means to kill. And me is I!” Or would it be I is me? Hmm. Well, they get the point. At least, they should.

The purple-robed man crossed his arms over his chest, and qi billowed out of him. My tail rose and puffed out, but it wasn’t completely stiff. If I fought him, I wouldn’t die, but I might not win either! How strong is this person? “Sect Leader Moonlight! What is the meaning of this? My Great Poison Sect might not be one of Kong’s five fingers, but I won’t let your disciple slap my face with false accusations! We’re not that easy to bully!”

The sect leader, who was sitting next to the person who kidnapped Ilya, oh! It’s Ilya! I waved at her. Wait, what was the sect leader doing? Right, he stood up and rose into the air. Then he landed in front of me. “Junior Lucia…. Do you mind explaining what’s going on?”

“Sure!” I pointed at the people in purple. “Those people tried to poison me.”

The sect leader followed my finger with his gaze. Then he turned to Softie. “Little Moon, do you mind explaining what’s going on?”

Hey! Don’t blatantly ignore me like that! I’m going to hit him. Breaking Blade! …Darn. How come his shield’s so strong? I’ll have to get Durandal to teach me how he managed to injure that other person with the shield. If I can’t hit someone, how am I supposed to solve my problems? This is a disaster that needs to be addressed immediately!

“I brought Lucia, err, Sister Lucia to the impurity-cleansing pool like sect leader asked. While we were there, the whole pool became contaminated and the impurity-cleansing fishes all died. Even now, the pool is filled with toxins that caused my fellow disciples’ skins to melt. The—”

“And my belly button turned into a nipple.”

“Yes, there’s that too. Along with melting skin, mutations occurred upon contact with the toxins. I think someone grew another toe.” Softie stopped speaking and nodded at her grandfather. She whispered, but I could still totally hear her, “I think it was Lucia’s fault.”

How was it my fault!? All I did was dip a towel into the pool! I only touched it with my fingertips. It can’t be my fault. She was making a jab at me, right? Right? Once the sect leader’s not around to defend her, I’ll teach her to call someone impure. Hmph.

“Junior Lucia.” The sect leader smiled at me. It looked friendly, but I’m sure the intent behind it wasn’t friendly at all! It was like Durandal’s sadistic smile! Did I join a sadist’s sect? Wait. They get qi from making people suffer heart devils; of course, this is a sadistic sect! I-I’m surrounded by perverts! “Do you have any proof that the Great Poison Sect did it? You seem extremely sure.”

“Ah, yeah. One of the disciples said it was the Greedy Poison Sect people.” I turned around. “Which one of you was it?” No one said anything. “Who. Was. It?”

“I-it was Brother Mint, Chosen Lucia!”

Everyone pointed at one person in the center of the crowd. He swallowed and walked up to me and the sect leader with his head hanging down. “Right.” I patted his shoulder, and his knees buckled. He was as scared as Softie. Does no one have a spine? “This person personally saw some Great Poison Sect people poisoning the pool.”

“P-personally…?”

Hmm? Did he say something? No, it must’ve been the wind.

“Is this true, Junior Mint?” The sect leader gave the junior an encouraging smile that looked completely inappropriate now that I know he’s a pervert, and the junior raised his head. “If you’re wrong, then you’ll be punished. Naturally, if you’re right, you’ll be handsomely rewarded.”

The minty person’s eyes shone. “Y-yes! With my own two eyes, I saw a Great Poison Sect disciple contaminate the impurity-cleansing pool!”

“There you have it! That’s my proof.” See? I knew it couldn’t be me. Now I can plunder everything from those people in purple, right?

“That’s preposterous!” the purple-robed people’s leader shouted. “Why would my Great Poison Sect wish to kill your chosen?”

“It doesn’t matter why! It only matters that you did!” Hasn’t he ever heard the phrase actions speak louder than words? “Eat my sword! Unrelenting Path of Slaughter: Breaking Blade!”

Softie sucked in a deep breath and a whip appeared in her hand. I knew she was a sadist! “Support Chosen Lucia!” Her whip cracked like lightning, and a black snake made of the heart devil worms appeared from the whip’s tip. It chased my Breaking Blade and opened its jaws wide to swallow the purple-robed people. I thought Softie was supposed to be weak!

“Support Chosen Lucia!” Every Shadow Devil Sect member rose to their feet, and many, many colorful techniques flashed through the air! Just kidding. All the techniques were composed of the black heart devil worms. There was no color at all. And just like that, the group of purple-robed people were forced into dire straits, but all of them were still alive somehow. Ah, there were tons of broken defensive-looking equipment on the ground; that must’ve been how they survived. Well, it’s not like I wanted to kill them in the first place! Everyone just jumped in after I attacked. I should’ve expected it since all the Shadow Devil Sect members are sadists who wouldn’t give up a chance to see someone else suffer. But they supported me right away—even if it was for their own perverted nature. This must be what it means to have the backing of a sect!


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